Dating Tales

Most of us find it very challenging to write on the inside of a card. Not just a Valentine’s Day card, but any card. What do you say and how do you say it? How do you make your message sound meaningful and memorable as opposed to just saying “I love you” or “Happy Valentine’s Day.”

Here are a few ideas that you should feel free to take exactly as they are written here, 0r you can modify the message to fit whomever you are giving your Valentine’s Day card to. We won’t tell.

I didn’t know that Valentine’s Day could be so special until I spent one with you

If only Saint Valentine knew…

Give me an I, Give me an L, Give me a U, Give me a V, Give me U - I LUV U.

Without you, V-Day would seem black. Thank you for making it red.

Here’s to a special day, a fun date, and a romantic evening.

Valentine’s Day is wonderful, but every other day is just as wonderful with you in it. Thank you for making every day a “heart” day.

A promise. Today won’t be the only day I tell you how much you mean to me.

A toast. Here is to many more Valentine’s Days together.

What do you get when you take you, me, a pot roast, and a Thursday night Lifetime movie? The answer: a perfect Valentine’s Day.

And if you are looking for even more inspiration, visit the DatingTales Compliments Sound Board.

Imagine this. You met a cute guy online and had a great first date with him. The day after your date you go on to the single site where you met to read all the wonderful details about him once again. You’re not logged in, of course, but you discover that his profile has been active within the last 24 hours.

You feel a little deflated. Maybe you feel like he didn’t like you as much as you like him.

This is one of the difficult parts of online dating, but don’t fret. Just accept the fact that he is dating several people. Online dating opens you (and those that you are dating) up to many different people at one time. That’s the glory of it. 

It’s not personal. If after the fourth, fifth, or sixth date it’s still bothering you, then you can bring it up with him. But until then, don’t look at his profile and just keep dating!

First date conversation can be painful, awkward, and superficial. Not everyone is a born conversationalist so a little bit of practice and research can go a long way. Think the Bridget Jones’ Diary scene where she practices pronouncing Chechnya.

Don’t forget the basics, of course, like schooling, hobbies, family composition, books, movies, etc., but to make that first date conversation flow here are a few other tips.

Listen to what your date is saying

The greatest conversation sources are waiting for you to jump on them. Just listen for follow up question openings and thenfollow up! For instance, your date tells you about his childhood in Albany and since you’ve never been there you ask more about the city, state, region. If you have been there, ask for more information on what you didn’t or did see.

Find offbeat news

Great sources of interesting conversation topics surely to entertain most of us can be found on Best-of-Craigslist, popular picks on Digg.com, and CNN’s Funny News. To fill up those lulls in the conversation, get a quick read on the internet that day so you’re prepared with a few stories.

Research your date’s interests

Find out from the friend that set you up, his profile, or on the phone before you meet what his interests are. This way you can research beforehand and come up with intelligent questions to ask on the date. He’ll be impressed.

Looking at your nightstand

Think about the book that’s currently on your night stand, the CD that’s playing in your car, the last vacation you took and be prepared for the questions you’ll be asked. Just like you, your date is preparing. In other words, you should be able to answer every question you ask your date.

Jokes: Tell a few

Don’t start now if you rarely tell jokes. But if you know you’re funny and your friends normally laugh at your jokes, you’re probably safe.

Avoiding these things

The ol’ saying that politics and religion shouldn’t be talked about in mixed company stands true for first dates too. Although these are things important in deciding on your mate, it’s a great way to scare someone off before they get to know you well.

I had an online romance a couple years back that I’m reminded of from time to time when I hear about perverts with camera phones. Sounds strange, I know, but after being introduced to a topless woman via camera phone let’s just say I’ve been a little scarred.

It was our second date after a short week or ten days on phone and e-mail. I met him on EliteMate.com and we quickly had a connection. He had a great sense of humor and seemed to be really interested, at least until the camera phone incident.

We were at an Irish Pub in my neighborhood enjoying a good ol’ Irish beer when he decides to tell me about his day off. He talked about how he surfs early in the morning and then naps on the beach until about 11 or so. Today, however, he was there a little longer because of this girl who was laying out topless.

I didn’t scowl, I just sat and listened acting completely interested all the while wondering if he realized what he was saying. My wonderment soon ended when he pulled out his phone to show me a picture of her… bare boobies and all. He did know what he was doing and that was clear when he said, “This is probably my first mistake, huh?”

First and last buddy.

A well-written profile is equivalent to having good table manners on a first date. If you don’t pay attention to the basics in dating either online or offline, you could miss out on a romantic connection.

The analogy of table manners is the same as having an organized and logical profile. Now this doesn’t need to be an eloquent five-paragraph essay, but just like in meeting someone face to face you have only seconds to impress that person. So choose your words wisely. Avoid swearing or using slang (at least use them sparingly), stick to point, and don’t bore your reader with details.

More importantly, be creative.

Don’t describe yourself in a cliche or generic way. Read the profiles of ten women and men in your area with characteristics similar to yours. Research your written profile by searching out your competitors. In reading these profiles list the things those people mention and notice the pattern, for example, does almost everyone mention travel, interesting books or movies, and Chinese food? Be sure not to include those items in your own profile. Be different.

Similarly find ten men or women whose profiles you like the most and would be interested in getting to know. Again, read each profile carefully and make a list of the things he or she writes about. You should definitely mention any unique interests that you share in your own profile.

The point is that you want to make a good impression so that your potential connections read all of your profile, and are motivated to contact you. You can woo this person later in your e-mails, but for right now just get them interested.

For more dating tips and to sign up for the DatingTales Profile Writing Service visit the DatingTales Online Dating Guide.