Ever had a breakup last weeks? Have you ever gotten back together with an ex more than three of four times?

Well if you haven’t, then you probably know someone who is notorious for dragging relationships on and on. Turns out, I am one of those people.

For close to three years I managed to date the same two guys over and over again. I’d break up with one, then get back together with the other. That relationship would fizzle and then I’d find myself talking to the other one again.

And on, and on, and on, and on.

Turns out neither one of these guys were “the one,” and after some major drama and putting thousands of miles on my car, I managed to put them both behind me. But not without learning some serious lessons first.

As part of my incessant need to impart my dating wisdom on you, here are seven tips on how to make your break up stick. And yes, they are listed in order of importance.

1 – Don’t agree to “just be friends.” Just don’t.

2 – If you run in the same circles (i.e., same job, clique, neighborhood, kickball team, etc), don’t drink together. I’m talking absolutely no alcohol at all. It might seem harmless to have one beer at your office party, but one beer leads to a shot to car bombs,  and then the next thing you know you’re sitting on his lap in the back of a cab on the way to the next bar…not that this has happened to me before or anything.

3 – Go into your email contacts and change his name to “Do Not Read.”

4 – Do not delete his number from your phone. Repeat, don’t delete him. Instead, change his name to “Do Not Answer.” If this doesn’t stop you from calling him or picking up his call, change his entry once again to read: “Sexually Transmitted Disease.”

5 -You’re no longer friends on Facebook, MySpace, LinkedIn, Twitter, and any other social network you are a member of. I’m serious about this, no exceptions.

6 – Sit down and write him a long letter that says everything you’ve ever wanted to say to him plus everything you have already said to him. The next night, sit down and write a list of the top 10 things you don’t like about him. Now, take both pieces of paper and rip them up and throw it all away. Don’t give them to him, he doesn’t need to see it. This is your closure.

7 – Fill your days and nights with distraction. Train for a marathon, join a book club, take a class, get a part-time job, write your memoirs, try speed dating. Do everything you can think of to keep your mind occupied.

Don’t waste years on someone you aren’t meant to be with. Sure, you’re passing the time, but while you’re “passing time” the right guy is out there not knowing you’re available.

For a time I thought everyone cheated in relationships. I didn’t think this because I grew up watching my parental figures move around in relationships (my parents are still married) and not because I am a cheater myself (never cheated, nope).

I thought everyone cheated because infidelity is so prevalent in pop culture. I mean, what happens in Hollywood is happening in real life, right?

Another reason I was convinced everyone cheated is because of the dozens of horrible stories I’ve heard from friends who have described their pain over cheating husbands, girlfriends, etc. I guess I didn’t stop to consider the fact that I’ve heard more happy love stories than not-so-happy love stories.

Moral of the story: I believed in some certifiable cheating-spouse hype.

It actually turns out that most people don’t cheat. I don’t think the “real” number of cheaters can be known, but according to a US News and World Report article, the percentage of cheating spouses is actually somewhere between 11% and 18%.

So what do you think?

A friend confessed to me that she was recently dumped by her boyfriend of six months in a night club.

It happened on a Friday night when she was out with her friends and b-friend watching her favorite band. As usual she was having a great time dancing, drinking, and soaking up the good tunes. Before she knew it the band was wrapping up their final set so she requested the tab from the cocktail waitress.

Her boyfriend leaned over and said someting in her ear. She couldn’t understand him so she looked inquisitvely back at him and kissed his lips.

He didn’t smile or return the kiss. Instead, he leaned back in toward her and screamed: “It’s over. I can’t date you anymore.”

That time she heard him loud and clear. Instead of responding with a kiss she responded by handing him the tab and then walking out with her friends.

Couldn’t the 2am dumping have waited til’ morning?

Researchers say men are most likely to stay in a relationship between two to 12 months, after which time they may be motivated to move on and find a new fling.

This could be fear of long-term commitment but it is more likely a search for those endorphins your body releases when you are falling in love. The butterflies, the euphoria, and the intense orgasms are all common in the beginning of a relationship.

If you think your guy might be chasing that new-relationship high, then it’s probably high time you get out. Here are eight tell-tale signs he is about to break up with you.

1. He’s never had a girlfriend for longer than six months and you’ve been dating for seven.

2. He canceled the trip to the Bahamas at the last minute.

3. He promised you’d meet his family but they came and left before you even knew they were in town.

4. He used to walk you to your car and now you’re lucky if he walks you to the door.

5. He takes hours to return a text message when it used to take seconds.

6. He doesn’t hold your hand anymore.

7. He is put out by the fact that you make other plans, yet he doesn’t include you in his.

8. He picks fights. Yesterday he yelled at you because you didn’t cut him a piece of clery.

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The Compliment Challenge for today has to do with a lame-o ex-boyfriend.

When my ex told me I was going to hell and he couldn’t see me any more I was sorta devastated and definitely confused. Although things had never been “good” between us, he certainly was never this mean.

He told me the morning after I’d stayed at his house for the night. I sorta couldn’t believe his timing. If he wanted to break up with me, if he wanted to make me feel bad, why did he choose to spend all that time with me before he gave me the boot?

It was a game. I know that. He wanted things to be over (for real, for good), and he didn’t know how to do it. He thought that if he proved there was some sort of fundamental flaw with me, then the break up wouldn’t be his fault; it would be mine.

He decided I didn’t love God as much as him and so he decided to bring the Big Guy into it.

I respect that. Or at least now I do. At the time I thought it was cheap, unfair, and a little two faced.

But he did me a favor. We were never good for each other. In fact, it was a bit of a disaster from the beginning and I’m just glad one of us had the courage to do something about.

So my compliment for today (and I had to dig deep for this one) is to say that I’m much happier now and I hope he is too, and if it weren’t for him making the good choice to break up with me who knows where I’d be.

No, Mr. Ex-Boyfriend, you don’t get a compliment for being a good breaker-upper, but you definitely succeeded at getting me out of your life forever.

And for the record, I’m pretty sure I’m not going to hell. But thanks for the warning.

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Divorce is a topic we rarely cover here on Dating Tales, mostly because our focus is on the good, the bad, and the ugly aspects of dating and reconoidering (good word, huh?) life on single sites with better profiles.

However, that doesn’t mean divorce is not a worthy topic to cover.

Like all things that end, a failed marriage can be difficult to deal with and an unfortunate set of experiences. There are steps all of us can take to improve in our relationships, both present and future, and one of my favorite love bloggers, LovesAGame, wrote a great post about.

Read all the wonderful communication tips on the site, and then do your best to incorporate them into your relationships from here on out.

Are you looking for love? Sign up for the Dating Tales profile writing service and get help with your online profile today. You never know when love will find you via e-mail.

Summer’s over and so is your fling. The only problem is that he doesn’t know it yet. Breaking up is never easy and there isn’t a good time to make it happen either. But there are times that are better than some, and consider today one of those times. Here’s why.

You’ve got 39 days before Halloween where you’ll be forced to dress up in some sort of couple-themed costume. If you break up before the leaves fall  you can wear the slutty costume you really want to wear anyway.

Engagement season begins in November and ends in February. Avoid a really uncomfortable situation with him on his knee by making a run for it now.

Thanksgiving is 66 days away and if you break up now you won’t have to buy any plane tickets to get to his grandma’s house.

Christmas is 94 days away and the sooner you break up the less likely you’ll have to buy him a gift.

New Year’s Eve is 100 days away. The last thing you want to do is suck face with a guy you can’t stand.

Valentine’s Day is 145 days away and if you start looking now, you might be able find a new sweetheart by then.

Once you’re rid of the current guy, start looking for the new one online. Dating Tales can help you out with your online dating profile. Fill out the initial questionaire for free!

It was a sad, sad morning for a friend of mine today. After what started off as a great night out at a local discotheque followed by a couple of drinks and a healthy serving of the only nachos worth eating after 12:30 am at a nearby dive bar, the night took a nosedive into Crapville when her most recent ex walked through the door.

It’s a little blurry (thanks to two dirty martinis and several Bud Lights) what happened next, but I’m pretty sure it involved another girl, fake smiles, and lots of tears. This morning I went to her place to cheer her up with bagels and a bloody mary and then also to piece the night back together again. I’m a lot like Humpty Dumpty, my friends say.

If the scene at the bar wasn’t enough, I guess after the cab dropped her off at home the sleeze ball felt the need to text message her half a dozen times with one sleezier message after the next. He wanted to come over and when she turned him down he got mean.

I felt (and feel) so bad for my friend. We’ve all been there and there’s no solace for a mending heart that is forced to deal with the cause of its injury with a blood alcohol content of .10.

After we finished our morning beverages I did manage to get my trooper of a friend smiling again, but the real magic happened when I started shopping online. While she was on the phone relaying the whole episode to another one of our friends, I visited eBags to look for the best “I’m hot and happy to be single” handbag I could find. And of course, I found something like eight of them.

After she hung up the phone I reminded her that there is free shipping on handbags at eBags.com and then left her to her devices. She just called a couple of minutes ago thanking me for wiping tears and agreeing to hate the monster for all my live long days, and also for recommending a new handbag. Her favorite “I Spy” should be arriving sometime next week.

So far all of you out there nursing your hangovers and heartaches, try a new handbag. You’ll be put all back together again, I promise.

Most would say yes, Sara, you are stupid. If it were a friend asking me this same question I’d say, yes friend, you are stoopid.

Basically, co-signing on a loan together means that you like the other person enough to accept his or her financial responsibilities whether you can afford them or not. And if that’s not an opportunity to say ‘yikes-o-rama’ I don’t know what is.

Of course, I’m not asking my boyfriend to pay for my brand new beautiful blue car. All I wanted was the best deal possible and the way to do that was through co-signange. So here we are a happy couple with a new level of commitment under our wings. I’m a little scared, I won’t lie.

But then I read this auto advice article by a blogger at Accurate Auto Advice. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t want my boyfriend to ever be an “ex,” but I’m also realistic. Anything can happen and I need to be looking out for myself. According to the article, I’m OK. If (and only if) things don’t work out, there are ways to renegotiate the deal without being linked to each other forever.

Vroom. Vroom.