Thursday, December 23, 2010

Finding Love in the Cereal Aisle

February 24, 2008 by Sara  
Filed under Dating Tips

An anonymous visitor recently left this comment on my post Bad Compliments a Man Can Give a Woman:

I am looking for some advice regarding complimenting women. There is a woman that works at a grocery store. Everytime that I go in there we are always making eye contact with each other. I have only talked to her once but I want to get her number. I am a good looking guy and have confidence, but I donít want to come across the wrong way. I want to show her that I am genuine and sincere.

What I am asking is, if I told her that I have seen many places and many faces but none as beautiful as you. And that I can tell by looking at you that there is more than meets the eyes.

Would that come across as weird to most women? I know that all women are different, and each and every situation is different, but I am just looking for some general advice.



Dear Anonymous:

First of congratulations on wanting to compliment a woman you are interested in. That is the first step to impressing her. However, you’re trying too hard. She might think your “seen many faces and places” line is a bit too contrived. Chances are she’s noticed you too so why not try to incorporate something about the grocery store into your pick-up line.

For instance, you could tell her she has nice peaches and hand her two peaches.

OK, maybe that’s not the best idea, but it would be funny.

Instead you could just be totally honest. Walk right up to her and say, “I shop here regularly and have been trying to build up the courage to talk to you for awhile. My name is Anonymous and I’d like to take you to dinner/coffee/movie/drink (whatever you like to do) and get to know you better. Here is my phone number. I hope you call.”

The key here is not to pressure her at that moment. She might just say no because she’s taken so off guard. And, if she doesn’t call right away that doesn’t mean she won’t further down the road. When you are in the grocery store say hi and smile, whether she calls or not.

Good luck Anonymous. I’m sure you will do great.

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3 Responses to “Finding Love in the Cereal Aisle”
  1. Sara says:

    Anonymous and I have been talking via comments on other posts. Here they are…


    Thank you for replying Sara. After I made the post, and before I read your response, I thought of just saying, ďyou caught my eye and I would like to get to know you better. Would you like to go out to dinner, movie, for a cup of coffee.

    It makes sense. I have been told by many women that I am a great guy, but I donít have any confidence. One woman actually told me that I am the type of guy that every girl wants to have as a boyfriend. I donít know if that was an insult, but I think one of my problems is that I try to hard, as you stated in your post.

    Also, like some other men, I am attracted to younger women, and generally speaking, and with all due respect, some younger women are still immature and are trying to figure themselves out and want to date someone who is a jerk.

    As every woman knows, it is very tough to find someone and there are so many things involved in making a dating decision. Sometimes I just feel like I should just give up, but you just never know who you might meet.

    Take care,




    Donít give up!!! I donít think that woman was trying to insult you, probably just trying to help. Take a deep breath, put yourself out there, and then just let it go. If she responds, then great. If not, their will be dozens more just like her.




    Thanks for the advice. I will take your advice and give it a try. You might not care, but I will let you and your readers know what happens. Since you will never know my true identity, I will admit that I donít put myself out there because I donít want to get hurt and I also think that people will see right through me and that scares the crap out of me.

    I am Irish and I donít like to open up to anyone. To quote the great movie Departed, ďFreud said that the Irish are the only ones who are impervious to psycho-analysis.Ē

    Maybe this is my time to finally put myself out there.

    Take care,


  2. J says:

    Everything seems alright in the advice given, except for one thing. Don’t give her your number and wait for a call. Ask for hers. Why? Unless she’s wholeheartedly attracted to you and not somewhere on the fence, she most likely will not call! Beautiful women tend to get approached often. Unless you take the initiative to spend time with her, there’s a major likelihood that she’ll forget about you.


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