Dating Tales

We all have been in a situation where we look back and say we should’ve known our ex was an abuser, a cheater, or a jerk. It’s easy to do in hindsight. I know because I’ve done it at least 18 times.

The reality is that because we liked the guy we justified the red flag so much so that it became more pink than red. That may be OK to do sometimes, but be honest with yourself. If, in fact, the flag is very red, then don’t ignore it and get out before it’s too late. Here are five examples of red flags:

1. Too rough. If even when playing around he grabs you too hard, twists an arm, or pushes you, he’s no good. A respectful person will never try to hurt his partner, even when they are just playing around.

2. “Who’s that guy?” syndrome. Chances are that if you get 20 questions over seemingly unimportant parts of your day that he is insecure. Everyone is a little jealous, even in a healthy relationship, but know the difference between a little and a lot of jealousy. If he puts you down or accuses you of things, then consider it a red flag.

3. Listen to your sister. There are exceptions to this rule, but know that your family and friends love you and want what is best for you. If someone close to you doesn’t like him, at least consider what they have to say about your new man.

4. What happened to the things you used to do? It’s natural to fall in love and have a few of your priorities change. You may spend less time on your hobbies or see your friends less, but don’t eliminate these things entirely. Consider it a red flag if your significant other makes you feel guilty for doing things on your own or prevents you from spending time with your friends.

5. One minute he’s sweet, the next he’s scary. Instability makes you worry about what kind of mood he’ll be in once you get home or about rearranging your day just to make him happy. The reality is that you should be with someone that is stable and who treats you well all the time.

Visit the DatingTales online dating guide for more tips like these, because these five red flags only scratch the surface.